Skinny derpin'

[shenunigans]

It's a good few months into the 'Dave doesn't swim' factor of Feferi and Dave's weird rivalry and Dave is pretty sure Feferi has tried to pull every card she has in an attempt to have him fully submerged. It doesn't work, of course. Dave is as protective of his swimming virginity as a nun is with. Well. Her regular virginity? Whatever. Point is he isn't going for it. In fact, as a form of revenge for her relentless bothering, she may just have found him snacking on her goldfish crackers like what up girl I'm eating your snacks. Needless to say, that didn't go down so well.

But it's whatever, right? It's in the past. Though Dave suspects it may not be over yet when he gets a text from Feferi asking him to bring her a towel at an absurd hour of the morning. He had promised he'd make it up to her for the crackers, so he begrudingly heads out to the pool with her stupid fluffy towel. Fuck nocturnal trolls and fuck stupidly pretty troll royalty who trick you into cutting them the sweet end of the deal. At the very least, he gets to see her in her swimsuit, right? Always a boner.

Bonus.

He thought bonus.


The mental goings on of a teenage boy aside, he's made his way to the pool in reasonable time with the towel over his shoulder and he's going to cup his hand over his mouth so he can loudly announce his entrance. Not that anyone but Feferi is around, given that it's 4am but that's beside the point.

"Yo, princess. There's like a million signs telling you not to forget a towel, could you have picked a lamer way to fuck with me?"

Comments

[shenunigans]

He’s pretty damn relieved that she doesn’t seem to nitpick all of his rambling. If she did, she’d be like Rose or John and that’s the opposite of sexy. For the best, sexiest moments together, it’s really better to ignore him until he runs out of stupid, brainless things to say. They might be here a while.

He had been sitting up to protest, but now he’s not sure why he even was or what he was trying to accomplish, so he’ll just fold his arms over his chest awkwardly and watch her as discreetly as possible. She doesn’t look disappointed, that’s the most important thing. He doesn’t doubt she’d be super subtle and point out that he has a silly looking dick or something to that effect. As far as he’s concerned, she thinks it’s great and can’t wait to get on it. Yep. Solid thinking.

When she moves, he decides to shuck off his boxers like it ain’t no thing and discard them with the same casual nature. He’s already been a princess about everything so far, he doesn’t want her to think he isn’t eager and ready to go in some sense. He’s no ho, but he thinks he could spare her the cost of a cow just this once.

“Right.” He looks over to her, brows knitting together as she hooks her thumb like that. What is she doing? Is it weird to ask? He may never know for sure, so he just stares intently at her before scooting a little closer.

“You mean you can’t do this yourself? Talk about lazy.” And yet his hands are eagerly reaching for her panties so he can tug them down her thighs. He’s moving quicker this time, starting to make himself impatient from how much he’s drawn it out.

[fintastic]

She lets him do the brunt of the work, pulling them down to her knees, then helps out a little so she can slip them the rest of the way. That's it, there's nothing more. Nothing else to take off, finally. That took a lot longer than she would have liked! It's been getting late-- or early, more like it-- and if they dragged it out any longer, she might have fallen asleep halfway through. Right now, though, she's got more than enough energy to drape herself loosely around his shoulders.

"Maybe I just like your hands all over me, is that really a crime?" Letting go, she dramatically swoons backwards onto the bed, with her arm over her face. "I don't know if I can live with the thought of having done something so heinous!"

Briefly, though, she peeks out from under her arm. "Am I doing it right? You know, the thing you do, with the sarcasm!"

[shenunigans]

Truly, Dave is the hardworking one here. He started this off bringing her a towel at a super inconvenient hour! He could have been thinking about sleeping. Rather than, y'know. Actually doing it like a normal human, non-nocturnal creatures that they are. Trust him to find complaints when he's about to get laid for the first time in forever.

"I wouldn't put xenophilia off the table of questionable acts." His tone is dry as ever, but his eyes are at least lit with a fond sort of fascination for her. He doesn't feel as shy as he usually would while looking at a naked chick, he guesses she's just that good at being disarming. That's pretty much confirmed when he manages not to blush at her draping over him. It's a good feeling, it's a great feeling and he can feel it without his brain protesting how lame he's being. It's nice.

An unattractive snort escapes his nose when she swoons backward, and he'll move alongside her to give her a look full of mixed feelings. You are way too goofy to be that attractive, Feferi. He can't tell if he's in a comedy or a romance movie right now. He feels like it's his turn to make a move of sorts, so he'll daringly place an arm on the curve of her waist and just sort of run it back and forth. "Don't quit your day job, kid." He leans in to bump their foreheads together, half climbing over Feferi as he does.

[fintastic]

"Oh well," she sighs, craning her neck to press back. By way of trying to sneak her legs around his, she encourages him to get right in there. Whether he realizes it or not, all his silliness, his lame jokes, and even the things that go over her head are relaxing. Someone serious would have been boring, or made her tense. Being able to just be casual with him tells her she's made the right choice, as if she ever actually doubted.

Slipping her arms up under his, she tilts her head to give a little kiss, before settling back down against the bed. "So now we just... wait, do I need to do anything?"

A better time to ask would have been maybe... never. She feels just a smidgen of embarrassment for having asked at all, but the mechanics have never been her utmost concern before now. She doesn't just want to leave him in the lurch if she can avoid it, he's been so good to her tonight, he surely does not deserve her shortcomings in the realm of lovemaking.