Look, when I say I don't have an issue with it- I really don't. Of all the stupid things I could take issue with, it is not this thing. I'm fine. It's just weird as hell and confusing to be a step ahead of everyone else, but I should be used to that already. It'll be fine. You guys do your thing and I'll get over it in like a day. If that.
I like you and I...'m okay with Vantas. As okay as you get with that guy, anyway. It's probably better if we keep the humans out of the relationship bingo anyway.
[Oh. Well fuck. Truthfully, last time Dave was here, things never progressed in that direction. If anything, there was pale further complicated by matters with Sollux.
But now this all makes entirely too much sense.]
For what it's worth, I'm sorry. I don't want this to become a bigger thing between us than it needs to be...I've done the whole distant from you thing before and it sucks. But I also probably kind of deserve it so, you know.
It's cool. Like I said, it's no big. It was a big...unavoidable thing. I don't even care. [Much.]
Oh hell no, don't start that crap. You are not going to avoid me because it's awkward. We're bros, we're in this for the long haul. We're all just gonna have to deal with it.
Heh. [He appreciates it, but he's absolutely terrible at this.] Call the cops cuz I don't give a fuck, we're gonna kick it old school. We can just pretend none of the dumb stuff ever happened.
ok i wwouldnt normally come to you like this but i got a bit of a uh predicament and im not sure wwho else to contact about it kar seems to be missin and all his beasts havve somehoww found me ONES A FUCKIN PLANT i dont evven knoww wwhat to do wwith this fuckin tiger look if you can help me wwith these beasts ill owwn you bigger than shit ok
yeah the stupid assblood didnt evven havve the decency to say good bye
i dont knoww wwho stevve irwwin is but if he can help in this situation i suggest you start learnin a thing or twwo about bein him BECAUSE I HAVVE NO IDEA WWHAT IM DOIN i aint desperate i just need some help
its not like anyone before him did anything but dump a whole lot of useless crap on us guess hes just following suit
steve irwin is a cool guy he fights crocodiles and doesnt afraid of anything i figured capslocking was a thing you did when you were desperate desperate for help pretty sure you contacted the worst man for the job fishpora
evven if its just the normal sorta deal i dont fuckin appreciate it any
then be like him and put this tiger in its fuckin place it keeps tryin to eat my cape and not alwways sometimes its for emphasis i dont care if youre the wworst or the fuckin best just get your pink husk here and help me
[Eridan thinks about responding, but fuck it, he can just say what he wants once Dave is here. Of course, him waiting is no easy thing, and probably is the singular reason why he's so worked up by the time Dave gets there. Sure, there's a tiger and other shit around, bit come on, he was so being dramatic over that, and now he's just riled, because goddamnit Dave!]
[When the knock sounds, he yanks the door open, offering Dave a scathing look.]
You better not fuckin' laugh at this situation I'm in, or I'll feed you to the tiger an' write that off as your "helpin'" me!
[With that said, he motions Dave inside.]
Now come on, you need to help me tame these fuckin' beasts... Sure, maybe the tiger is a bit much for anyone to know what to do right off the bat but... I dunno, you got any experience with squeakbeasts?
Is that really the look you're going to give the guy who came running to your assistance? Christ. They need a fucking manners school for you nasty ass bitches. [He pushes past Eridan without much care for his gesturing.]
Nope. I never had a pet. I had puppets. Pretty sure I was more like Bro's pet than anything, to be perfectly honest. [He taps his finger on his chin.] I remember that I liked being fed. Maybe we should do that.
first off its rap not slam poetry there arent nearly enough bongos for it to be poetry secondly hes my brother not my friend my brother in a universe where im old and famous and one of you guys is trying to get up in earths grill or did im not sure
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